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| HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! | |
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+3dirtydawg10 Mostlycichlids Lady G 7 posters | Author | Message |
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Lady G Member
Posts : 340
Age : 50 Location : WI Humor : Of course I have humor!!!! Favorite Fish : the ones in water!
| Subject: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:32 am | |
| Ok, so yes I know I'm a female...and yes some of these are kinda "ify" to add to a site, but my sister sent this to me and it cracked me up and it DOES say in the GCC thing that there may be topics not good for all....sooooooooooo, sorry to any other gals this may offend, but I couldn't help it I cracked up reading this and I'm sure most here will like it. The last one had me ROLLIN!!!!!
VERY BRAVE MAN JOKES ---
How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry It!
What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side.
What are the three fastest means of communication? 1) Television 2) Telephone 3) Telawoman
How are fat girls and mopeds alike? They're both fun to ride until your friends find out.
What should you give a woman who has everything? A man to show her how to work it.
Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of breasts in there.
How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it.
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up? Because they don't have balls to scratch.
Why did God create woman ? To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.
Why do women fake orgasms ? Because they think men care.
What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes? Nothing, she's been told twice already.
If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? Made her chain too long
How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened when she brings it.
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'
How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman who won't do what she's told
I married a Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%... It's called a Wedding Cake.
Why do men die before their wives? They want to.
Women will never be equal to men.. until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. | |
| | | Mostlycichlids Cichlid Specialist
Posts : 4566
Age : 44 Location : New Mexico USA Favorite Fish : Jaguar Cichlid
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:15 am | |
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| | | dirtydawg10 Global Moderator
Posts : 3098
Age : 52 Location : Connecticut Favorite Fish : Severum
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 8:41 am | |
| Those are great, LG! Thanks for sharing. | |
| | | Redneck Woman Invert Junkie
Posts : 784
Age : 57 Location : Kentucky Favorite Fish : angels,but kribs are a very close second
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 11:56 am | |
| Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up? Because they don't have balls to scratch. I just about spit coffee with that one!! | |
| | | Mostlycichlids Cichlid Specialist
Posts : 4566
Age : 44 Location : New Mexico USA Favorite Fish : Jaguar Cichlid
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 1:49 pm | |
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| | | rich311k Member
Posts : 273
Age : 59 Location : Long Island, NY Humor : I have none. Favorite Fish : Angels and Blue Rams
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:44 pm | |
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| | | Grumpa Master Profiler
Posts : 1220
Age : 52 Location : cichlid world Humor : Not often Favorite Fish : tanganikian
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 6:27 pm | |
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| | | Mike D DIY Guy
Posts : 1842
Age : 41 Location : Maine Humor : You can't offend me
| Subject: Re: HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:28 pm | |
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| | | | HAHAHHAAAHA!!!!!!!!! | |
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